Throughout my college career, I dreamed of working at a hotel front desk. Oh the liberty and freedom it would give me to do homework on the clock, stoning two birds at once if you will. Now that I am in my last semester of undergrad, I finally have that job I had always thought to be so grand, boy was I mistaken. Sure, I have all the time in the world to do homework (which is abundant these days), waste time on the internet, and I've watched more TV since I have had this job than I probably have in a year or two, but boy are there a lot of creepers.
A man who is very odd and lurks around the mall staring at young girls. A creeper can also be a very weird looking man or boy who does not like to socialize but just stays in a corner and stares at people.
I would say, I greatly agree with this definition of "creeper," some great examples would be my last week at the hotel.
Monday:
A filthy old man comes in, looks a lot like the truck driver type that we see a lot here. We'll call him Joe-bob.
Why? Because I'm telling the story and will use whatever names I see fit.
Usually this type might call me "hun" or "darling," but subtleties was not this guy's game.
I greet him like I do any other guest with a "Hello" and "How can I help you today?" (Which might I add always seems to puzzle people, because we only have one service, and that's renting hotel rooms.)
But the first words out of his mouth were "Well! Aren't you just a sexy little thing!"
I try to respond politely with a smile, but anyone that knows me well knows I do not take well to sexism in any form.
I run through the script with the prices and types of rooms, but he is persistent to talk about me.
I eventually get his information and begin the check-in process, but the longer he stands in the lobby the more he seems interested in my life.
"I bet your husband doesn't tell you how sexy you are."
"How old is your husband"
"Do you like 'em older"
"I bet your husband doesn't treat you good."
After he drones on and on about my "husband" for a while and I continue saying nothing at all he then realizes I'm not wearing a ring.
Life lesson #1 for the week: Maybe diamonds really are a girls best friend, if they can keep away the creepers.
He then, for whatever reason, thinks he has a chance with me so he tries even harder to ask when I'm getting off work and what I'm doing tomorrow...
At this point, I just cannot take any more.
I don't care if he is the customer, the customer can kiss my ass.
My last words to him were "Sir, please just let me do my job so you can go to your room and get the hell out of my lobby."
He seemed pretty offended, but at least he didn't come back for the rest of the night.
Tuesday:
Tuesday wasn't nearly as bad, but I just had some weird instances that just made me wonder what in the hell people were thinking.
A large truck with an even larger trailer pulls up in the parking lot around 8pm.
This isn't out of the ordinary at all because most of our guests are headed somewhere and usually have a lot of stuff.
Around 8:20pm the phone rang.
It was a man asking to make a reservation for two.
Again, not out of the ordinary.
But when I asked him when he would be checking in he responds, "well, I'm in your parking lot now."
I wasn't really sure how to respond to that since any normal person would have just come inside knowing that you have to not only pay for a room before you can get into it, but you will also need a key which I cannot deliver over the phone.
I try to politely ask the man to come inside, but he again responds with "well, I'm in your parking lot."
I try to explain that I cannot check him in over the phone and even if I could he would still have to come to the front desk at some point if he wanted to get into the room at all.
I guess I finally got through to him because about half an hour later he comes waltzing in.
Again the filthy trucker type, but not nearly as creepy this time.
He continues to complain about having to come inside when he was already in the parking lot, but I couldn't think of anything to say to him other than "I hope you have a great night's rest, sir."
Life lesson #2 for the week: Never underestimate the unreasonableness and laziness of people. Never.
Wednesday:
This day made me of so happy that I (normally) only work four days a week and so tomorrow would be my Friday and I could have a break from this weirdness.
Most of the night was relatively smooth (and slow).
My boss had warned me of an older man that upon check-in had told her all about himself and that he was here to meet a girl and proceeded to pay cash for a week-long stay.
After staying only two nights the man comes up to the the front desk around 9pm and is crying and demanding that he needs to leave as soon as possible because things are not working out and he needs a refund for the rest of the week.
Knowing that I do not have that much money on hand, and not sure if I can even authorize to refund that much money anyway, I call my boss.
I let him know that he can get a refund in the morning when he checks out.
This seems to cheer him up a bit, but he still seems very heartbroken.
My guess is he got here expecting a young girl and got another creepy old man like himself. Its the most likely of scenarios.
After he has perked up a little he gets more interested in me and proceeds to ask me question after question and after question. Although I wouldn't have responded any way, he wasn't even giving any time for a response.
So, how old are you?
Are you in high school?
I bet you are in high school.
Am I right? Oh, I know I'm right.
What are you, 16, 17?
Oh you cannot be 18, you are just too cute to be 18.
I bet you are 17. Am I right?
Do you have a boyfriend?
Does he treat you good?
Do you like older men?
...
At this point I am thoroughly creeped out, as I'm you can understand.
Having learned my lesson earlier this week with creepy old men, I didn't even attempt polite.
Instead, I said through gritted teeth, "Please return to your room now."
Although he left, I still had that weird feeling that he would peering in on me for the rest of the night. It doesn't help that the lobby is almost completely windows and its dark out so early now that you cannot see a thing outside after 7pm.
Life lesson #3 for this week: Even though my friends say I dress like a grandma, apparently I still look good enough to be considered jail bait to creepy old men.
Thursday:
My Friday. Finally.
The night starts off fairly smoothly, not even many homeless people wandering around outside.
Maybe they were taking the holiday off from panhandling.
Then about 8pm I get a phone call from what is obviously a young homosexual male.
He states that he has lost his camera and thinks he may have left it in the room during his stay last week.
People leave things all the time and we simply ship them back to them and charge their credit card for the shipping fees, not really a big deal.
We don't want their random crap.
So this guy is isn't sure what room he stayed in and isn't sure whose name it was under, but knows the date.
I let him know that there is not a whole lot I can do for him since he doesn't have a lot of information, but I will leave a not for housekeeping to call him back if they have found a digital camera to find out if it is his.
He then refuses to leave a call-back number and wants to know when I work next so he can call back then because he doesn't feel comfortable talking to anyone else.
Not weird at all...and by that I mean extremely.
He then starts rambling on about how he is a "gay man" so he is obviously harmless and just wants his camera back because it has very incriminating footage.
I once again state that I will leave a note for housekeeping and they will check and know by the time he calls back.
Apparently, by restating my solution to his issue he took that as "PLEASE TELL ME THE JUICY DETAILS!!"
So he proceeds to tell me that he lives with a retired couple and that they were on vacation to meet some married men for a little "fun."
And apparently all that "fun" is on that camera.
At this point I am trying desperately to get off the phone ASAP and as politely as possible.
He then assures me that they are all adults and recites all of their ages and how well they treated him.
After he drones on for another few minutes about some of the details of his escapades in the sack with married men he miraculously gets a sense of embarrassment and starts apologizing profusely for giving so much detail and assures me that he will talk to me again.
At this point, I am so thoroughly creeped out that I just end the call abruptly with a "OK, thanks for calling, BYE!"
And as if it were the theme of the night, just about 10 minutes after I hang up the phone, a man walks in to ask if we have a rate that charges by the hour...
Wow.
Life lesson #4 for this week: Try to act more not caring, because apparently my phone voice cares a lot.
I'm happy to say that my week is almost over, it is 9pm on Thursday night, so only two more hours and I can get away from the hotel creepers for a couple days. Unfortunately, I have to work Sunday, but who knows, maybe creepers take a break on Sundays...I can only hope.
